Do you ever think back over your life and ask yourself what you would do differently if you could go back? I’m just guessing, but I would suppose most, if not all, of us have asked ourselves that question. I think that there is a balance between it being a good exercise and realizing that it is a waste of time. Why? Because we can’t go back and change anything. We could end up frustrating ourselves wishing things could have been different.

But let’s do it anyway. Let’s think back just for a moment and make a short list of things we wish we’d done differently. Don’t get too caught up in this because I have an idea for you. Something that I have learned along the way is that I can always come up with a list of these things. But the real benefit of this little exercise is not to look back wistfully and wish things were different. What I’ve learned along the way is that when I recognize something I could have done better, I ask myself if I’m doing it better today.

Let’s think together and come up with a theoretical list……

• “I could have been smarter with my money.” OK. If you recognize bad financial decisions in the past how are you handling money today? Spending less? Saving more? Making educated investments? Humbling yourself to ask for advice?
• “I wasted a lot of time.” What do you think was a waste of time? Are you avoiding those kinds of things today? Can you define for yourself what time well-spent is? Is it more time with your family? Less time at work?
• “I could have been more loving.” I doubt if any of us are exempt from this one. Looking back do you see people who needed you but who you avoided? Today are you paying more attention to the needs of others than you are to your own needs? Is too much of your time spent expecting others to take care of you or are you investing yourself in them?
• “I wasn’t a good listener.” We can be selfish at times, especially in our younger years. We want others to listen to us, but we don’t give them the time they need and deserve to open their hearts and talk to us. Today, make the decision to value others enough to listen, not just hear them.
• “I didn’t pay attention to the needs of others.” We are sometimes greedy for love, attention and compliments. This is all about ego. What about the love, attention and compliments others want and need? You might say they don’t deserve it. To be honest, they might not. But have we always deserved the attention that we sought? Did we really need more compliments about something we achieved? Today, begin to make others your focus rather than wanting their focus to be on you.
• “I wish I’d written that book/learned a language/learned to play an instrument.” This can be different for all of us. I will admit that I’ve tried all three with limited success in the book area and zero success in the other two. What about you? What do you wish that you’d learned or practiced? In all honesty it can be harder to learn new things the older we get, but that shouldn’t stop us from trying. Find a new challenge. Get together with a friend and take up a new sport…appropriate to your age, of course! Read that book you’ve never given enough time to. Learn to cook something new. Get it going today!

Of course I could go on, but you get the idea. If there is anything that you would say that you would do differently, DO IT DIFFERENTLY TODAY! Show more love. Give more compliments. Be generous with your time and attention. You will undoubtedly find this course correction to be one of the best decisions of your life.

Chuck Phillips

Life Choices Christian Counseling,LLC

Licensed Christian Pastoral Counselor, N.C.C.A.

Board Certified Professional Life Coach, I.B.C.C.

LifeChoicesCLC.Com LifeChoicesCLC@gmail.com

573-280-5093